Absolute Twaddle: Make Mine Gothic

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13 October, 2020 by katelaity

Some like their stories plainly told,

Others like ’em fairly old.

Some like cops & crime & such,

Others they don’t read that much.

But when I’m asked (I rarely am)

I explain that my needs aren’t that glam:

Give me haunted castles, spooky runes,

And some ancient legacies of ruin.

Make my nightdress white and billowy,

With a creek that runs all moss and willowy.

A Byronic hero or his mad mother

Own the crumbling pile where the winds wuther.

Can the sister stern be your only hope

To escape shifting sands? Or nope?

The doors that creak, the windows rattle:

Finding help, that’s half the battle.

But trust no one! Not the kindly cook,

Nor the stable boy with a chancey look.

In a gothic tale it’s all suspect —

From the chapel locked to the ship that’s wrecked.

Grab your tartan cloak and sensible shoes,

Your independent gumption & clear-eyed views,

Scale the rocky walls holding the ivy strong,

Take cheese for the journey (it might be long).

Let no man be your master, be no one’s fool,

Keep your wits about you: the golden rule.

With tenacity, fortitude and a bit of spunk,

(And that bag of pearls you found in a trunk)

You’ll avenge the wronged and find love to cherish

Even if getting there was a bit nightmarish…

Coming soon from Fox Spirit Books: The Mangrove Legacy — A Gothic Romance of Mystery, Romance…and Pockets!

Image via The British Library Flickr: Album of Scottish Scenery: a series of views, illustrating several places of interest mentioned in Sir W. Scott’s Poems and Novels. By D. Roberts, W. Westall, J. M. W. Turner … With descriptions by J. Tillotson, 1860.

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